Ugh

Feeling sick is becoming distressful. So sick, so tired. Sometimes I don't want to walk down the hall. Sometimes it feels like I can't stand, although I can stand.

As always, feeling sick is one thing and being distressed about feeling sick is another. I need to work it out.

A woman walked up to my desk today at work and said, "You look like you're really going through something". She was referring to my baldness. She asked me what was going on. When I looked confused she said that she knows SO many people with cancer. I wouldn't give her a thing.

I'd never seen her before in my life. I asked her name.

Finally she looked so stricken by my lack of response that I let her off the hook. Yes, yes... so much cancer these days, I said. She scurried away.

She has a story now and it's likely something about the Mean Lady w/ Cancer.

I have a story, too. Chicken soup and Hanukkah candles and rereading Gone With The Wind and Eric in the next room entering his student's grades into the computer. Cancer, too. Feeling sick, too. Sick, sick, sick. Sick.